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What Does the Bible Say About Sex Before Marriage?

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Does the Bible teach that sex before marriage is a sin?

Written by Gary Schneider on 23/04/2019

Series: Weekly Devotional

Tags: Marriage, Sex, Adultery, Pre Marital, Purity

“Let marriage be held in honor among all…”

Hebrews 13:4

Does the Bible even call sex before marriage a sin?

A lot of people in today’s world aren’t sure. Our culture has told us that we should do whatever makes us feel good in the moment and that we shouldn’t even consider what the moral thing to do is.

Here are several verses to consider when thinking about sex before marriage:

1. 1 Corinthians 7:2

“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”

In this verse, the apostle Paul describes any activity outside of marriage as “sexual immorality.” That means when we read of sexual immorality, it includes sex before marriage as one of many examples of sin.

2. Hebrews 13:4

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

What does an undefiled marriage bed look like? It looks likes a bed that a husband and a wife share exclusively together. Any kind of sex that is before, outside or in addition to a married relationship of husband and wife is sinful according to the Bible.

3. Galatians 5:19-21

“Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”

In this long list of sins, the sexual sins that Paul includes are sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, and orgies. It would be impossible to argue that the Bible approves of sex outside of marriage. Elsewhere, (1 Corinthians 7:2-5), Paul gives permission for sex between a married man and woman, thus all other forms of sex are sinful.

4. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles, who do not know God…”

Here, Paul contrasts a believer’s self-control over his body with living out of control, burning in passionate lust. The first is living a life that is pleasing to God and is holy, while the second is living a life that does not honor God. In which group do you belong? Does sleeping with someone you meet at a club or are not married to demonstrate control over one’s body, or is it done in the passion of lust?

5. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”

These verses speak to the basis of God’s claim on our body. A Christian is to refrain from sexual intercourse with anyone to whom they are not married because Christians belong to God. We have been given the great gift of God indwelling us — the Holy Spirit lives within us — so when we join ourselves to others through one-night stands or anyone we are not married to, we are violating our own body, the other person’s body and the Lord, who has purchased us by pouring out his own body and blood.

If you’ve had sex before marriage, don’t worry! Hope is not lost. God is more than able to forgive you of all of your sins — even the sin of having sex before or outside of marriage. 

1 John 1:9 promises us: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” Turn away from all sexual immorality and seek to live under God’s forgiving love. 

For those of us who do struggle with burning passion, just know that it is worth it to wait for the right time to enjoy the gift of sex. Pray that the Lord will bring you a faithful and God-fearing spouse. Sex is a wonderful privilege that comes with great responsibility. You will not regret living your life God’s way!

Pray this week:

Lord Jesus, you know all the ways I have sinned against you and disobeyed your Word. Please forgive me and cleanse my body, soul and spirit with your precious blood. As your child and as a temple of the Holy Spirit, I surrender my body to you. Thank you Jesus for strengthening me and blessing my future spouse with the same blessing that you now give to me. In Jesus’ name Amen. 

How about taking a first step and asking for God’s help? Are you willing to do that?

Alan Zibluk Markethive Founding Member

Markethive

Don’t Forget Who You Belong To

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You have been given many gifts, but it’s up to you to use them correctly.

Written by GodLife on 19/02/2019

Series: Weekly Devotional

Tags: Bible, Character, Leadership, Obedience

She said, ‘The Philistines are upon you, Samson!’ And he awoke from his sleep and said, ‘I will go out as at other times and shake myself free.’ But he did not know that the Lord had departed from him. Then the Philistines seized him and gouged out his eyes, and they brought him down to Gaza and bound him with bronze chains, and he was a grinder in the prison.

Judges 16:20-21

When I was in grade school, my homeroom teacher nominated me to be a ‘super kid.’ This recognition was for all the kids who received good grades, had exemplary behavior and showed great leadership skills. As a reward, we would get prizes and even a t-shirt with the Superman logo on it to show that we were ‘special.’ 

In the Bible, there are many examples of people who were special, too. Today, I want to talk about Samson. Maybe you know him as the strong guy with super long hair who defeated the Philistines (Judges 15:16), but there is so much more to his story, his character, and his supernatural strength. Let’s dig a little deeper into his life.

Samson was chosen and set apart 

Even before he was born, Samson was blessed and set apart (Judges 13: 4-6). He dedicated himself to God as a Nazarite, a person entirely set apart for God. As a sign of obedience, a Nazarite drank no wine, would not go near a corpse or make himself unclean and would let his hair grow as a sign to his commitment to the Lord (Numbers 6:1-8). 

Samson looked the perfect example of a Nazarite. With his long hair and mighty strength, he had everything that identified him as a follower of God at first glance. He was also known as an Israelite warrior and a judge who led Israel for 20 years (Judges 16:31). Even his name, which means ‘little light’ or ‘little sun,’ served as a symbol in a time when the people of Israel were walking in so much sin and darkness. (Judges 13:1) 

Samson was a leader Israel deserved 

With all the titles and his outside appearance, one would think Samson lived a life according to his vow, but the truth is, he was far from obedient. Whatever he set his eyes upon, he wanted. For example, he first broke his vow as a Nazarite when he chose his wife. “I saw one of the daughters of the Philistines at Timnah. Now get her for me as my wife,” he told his parents. The Philistines didn’t serve God and were mortal enemies of the people of Israel. But his disobedience didn’t end there. Later on, “Samson went to Gaza… saw a prostitute and went to bed with her” (Judges 16:1). 

Samson is defeated 

Ultimately, Samson’s fall began when fell in love with Delilah, a woman who betrayed him for silver and turned him in to the Philistines. “My hair has never been cut because I am a Nazarite to God from birth,” he revealed to Delilah, “If I am shaved, my strength will leave me, and I will become weak and be like any other man” (Judges 16:17).

Delilah betrayed him by cutting his hair while he slept, and the Philistines took him as a prisoner. Gouging his eyes out, they forced him to grind grain in prison. 

In his brokenness and humiliation, Samson pleaded to God, and the Lord listened. “Lord God, please remember me,” Samson implored. “Strengthen me, God, just once more. With one act of vengeance, let me pay back the Philistines for my two eyes.” The Lord gave Samson his strength back, and he used it to kill the Philistines by pushing the pillars of the temple. (Judges 16: 28-30).

So, What can you learn from Samson? 

Samson’s story serves as a warning to every believer. He used supernatural strength to kill a lion with his bare hands (Judges 14:6), but couldn’t break the chains of sin. Instead of becoming a great leader to turn his people back to God, he lived, married, coexisted and died with the Philistines.

As believers, we have a ‘spirit of power’ (2 Timothy 1:7), but we must not use it for our benefit. We must compliment it with love and self-control so that we guard what the Lord has given us, and with the guidance of the Holy Spirit living within us, His name will be glorified. 

Pray this week:

“Lord, forgive me if I’ve ever acted upon my own will and not yours. Give me the opportunity to show those around me that I belong to you. Amen.” 

Where has the Lord called you to be obedient to Him in your life? Have you listened?

Do you want to reach your full potential for the Lord but need spiritual guidance? Connect with a caring Christian friend today! 

Alan Zibluk Markethive Founding Member

Markethive

The Idolatry of People-Pleasing

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What if I'm more afraid to displease important people than God?

Written by GodLife on 13/09/2016
Series: Weekly Devotional
Tags: Idolatry, Influence, Relationships, Submission
So now run away to your place. I said I would give you much honor, but the Lord has kept you from honor.

Numbers 24:11
A story in the Bible's book of Numbers shows how dangerous the desire to “please men” can be (Colossians 3:22). This story is mentioned a lot in the Bible. Each mention comes with a warning.

God wants us to take note: what can this story teach us about ourselves?

1. It is Dangerous To Look For God’s Permission And Not His Approval
Fearing Israel, King Balak sent for the prophet Balaam. God told Balaam not to go. King Balak persisted, so Balaam asked God again.

God seemed persuaded: he gave Balaam permission to go. On his journey, the donkey he was riding was blocked by an angel with a drawn sword. The donkey refused to keep going, angering Balaam so much that he beat the animal. Before he could kill her, God allowed the donkey to speak, warning him of the danger. God then opened Balaam’s eyes to see the angel standing ready to kill him!

Just as the donkey’s actions went against Balaam’s plan for her, Balaam himself had nearly been killed for resisting God. But Balaam presses again, and finds the permission, (not the approval), of God.

2. There is Danger in Getting Around God’s Purposes
Accompanying the messengers back to Midian, Balaam at first blesses Israel instead of cursing them. God had warned him to do only as he was told. (Numbers 22:20) Balak is furious. Later we’re told (Numbers 31:16) that Balaam taught the Midianite women to seduce the Israelite men into idolatry. (Numbers 25:1-3) Terrified by Balak, Balaam cunningly thought of a way to curse the Israelites without speaking the curse himself, still a violation of God's instructions.

3. The Outcome of the Fear of Man
Balaam’s conduct shows perversion in a believer's walk:

The “way of Balaam” (2 Peter 2:15) — “against” God. (Numbers 22:32) If it was to his advantage, Balaam didn’t fear taking God's mercy for granted. In his heart, he said, “God has said ‘no’ to this–maybe there's a way I can do it anyway.”
The “error of Balaam” (Jude 11) — failing to learn the lesson of the encounter. Balaam was physically stopped and even threatened.
The “doctrine of Balaam” (Revelation 2:14) — passing this attitude along. Balaam was willing to try to spoil the purpose of God.

Presumption leads to the error of trying to get around God’s will. This means we manipulate, teach or become a bad example, leading others down the same corrupt path. Balaam may have said the Lord was his God. But he had idolatry in his life all along: respect of human favor over God’s. How much will God allow if we presume upon His grace? Balaam’s idolatry led him to serve God’s enemies, curse himself (Numbers 23:9) and demonstrate God’s denial of his prayers (Numbers 23:10) in the manner of his death. (Numbers 31:8)

Pray this week:
Father, I surrender myself to you again. I want your way to prevail in my life. Protect me from presumptuous sin.

How can you know God’s good, pleasing and perfect will for your life?

Alan Zibluk Markethive Founding Member